JOHNNY: "Say Mom, was our baby sent down from heaven?"
MOTHER: "Yes, son."
JOHNNY: "I guess they like to have things quiet up there, huh?"
How do babies get their belly buttons?
When God finishes making little babies, He lines them all up in a row. Then he walks along in front of them. He pokes each one in the tummy with His finger and says, “You’re done…you’re done…you’re done…"
It has been finally realized that babies born on holidays are more than likely to be little girls...
The reason is because there is no mail delivery on holidays.
A woman in labor suddenly shouted, "Shouldn't! Wouldn't! Couldn't! Didn't! Can't!"
"Doctor, what's going on?" asked the concerned father-to-be.
"Don't worry," said the doctor, "those are just contractions."