misc jokes

Seven-year-old John had finished his summer vacation and gone back to school. Two days later his teacher phone his mother to tell her that John was misbehaving.

"Wait a minute," said the mother. "I had John here for two months and I never called you once when he misbehaved."

Q. What's te definition of a bachelor pad?
A. All the house plants are dead, but there's something growing in the refrigerator.

While on a bus one woman asked another, with grat curiosity,
"well, what happened on your date with dashing Prince Lancelot?"
"Yuk!' was the disillutioned reply. "He was more like disgusting Prince Lust-a-lot, and
I was the one who needed the suit of armor!"

To impress his date, the young man took her to a very chick Italian restaurant. After sipping some fine wine, he picked up the menu and ordered. "We'll have the Giuseppe Spomdalucci," he said. "Sorry, sir," said the waiter. "That"s the owner."