Best Jokes

After many sessions the psychiatrist says to his patient: Congratulations, Sir, you are cured. The patient says: Some cure. Before I was Alexander the Great. Now I’m nobody.

A man entered a barbershop and said: “I am tired of looking like everyone else!
I want a change! Part my hair from ear to ear!”
“Are you sure?”
“Yes!” said the man.
The barber did as he was told, and a satisfied customer left the shop.
A few hours passed and the man reentered the shop. “Put it back the way it was,” he said. “What’s the matter? Asked the barber. “Are you tired of being a nonconformist already?” “No”, he replied, “I am tired of people whispering in my nose!”

If you drop a fork, it’s a sign company is coming. If a fork is missing, it’s a sign company is leaving.

Is a technique for distributing all the junk in your garage among all the other garages in the neighborhood.