Best Jokes

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This man enters the bakery with a loaf of bread, "I bought this bread here, and it tastes bad."
"What!" exclaimed the baker. "I've been baking bread for 25 years!" 
The man replies, "You should have sold it right away!"

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CATEGORY Work Jokes
posted by "Michel Frankland" |
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Bob and his wife were walking into the parking lot when a friend, Larry, saw them. Larry asked, "Bob, why are you walking so far? Did your car break down?" Bob replied, "No, my wife read how you could burn off more calories by parking further away." 
Larry asked, "How far away did you park?" Bob responded, "About 10 calories."

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CATEGORY Marriage Jokes
posted by "Bobby" |
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What did the mayo say when someone opened the refrigerator door? 
"Close the door, I'm dressing!"

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CATEGORY Misc Jokes
posted by "Anonymous" |
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Signs you've had too much of the '90s Part II

21. Board members salaries are higher than all the Third World countries annual budgets combined.
22. It's dark when you drive to and from work, even in the summer.
23. You know exactly how many days you've got left until you retire.
24. Interviewees, despite not having the relevant knowledge or experience, terminate the interview when told of the starting salary.
25. You see a good looking, smart person and you know it must be a visitor.
26. Free food left over from meetings is your staple diet.
27. The work experience person gets a brand-new state-of-the-art laptop with all the features, while you have time to go for lunch while yours powers up.
28. Being sick is defined as you can't walk or you're in hospital.
29. You're already late on the assignment you just got.
30. There's no money in the budget for the five permanent staff your department is short of, but they can afford four full-time management consultants advising your boss's boss on strategy.
31. Your boss's favorite lines are: When you've got a few minutes...Could you fit this in...?...in your spare time...when you're freed up...I know you're busy but...I have an opportunity for you
32. Holiday is something you roll over to next year.
33. Every week another brown collection envelope comes round because someone you didn't know had started is leaving.
34. You wonder who's going to be left to put into your 'leaving' collection.
35. Your relatives and family describe your job as "works with computers."
36. The only reason you recognize your kids is because their pictures are on your desk.
37. You only have makeup for fluorescent lighting.
38. You read this entire list, kept nodding and smiling.
39. As you read this list, you think about forwarding it to your "mates you send jokes to" e-mail group.
40. It crosses your mind that your jokes group may have seen this list already, but you can't be bothered to check so you forward it anyway.

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CATEGORY Misc Jokes
posted by "Anonymous" |