Son: "Mom, do I look like God?"
Mom: "No, honey. Why?"
Son: "Because everywhere I go, people say, 'Oh God, he is back!'"
Why did the gardener always eat her toast dry?
Because she saw the butter-fly!!
Pig 1: Why don't we ask him to sit with us?
Pig 2: No way, he is quite the Boar!
Why did the teddy bear skip lunch?
Because he was stuffed!!