entertainment jokes

Category: "Entertainment Jokes"
$5.00 won 1 votes

Three engineering firms were competitively bidding on Red-Sea tunnel project for the government of Egypt. The first engineer stands before the board and begins describing how he will accomplish the task. He says, "We will begin boring from both sides of the sea and join the tubes in the middle. Our plan has 10% margin of error for missing the center point but we have B-plan ready to rectify the error and finish the tunnel."

Second engineer comes in and describes his plan. "We will begin boring on both ends and meet in the middle. Our calculations may have 5% margin of error and our plan B is ready to rectify and connect the tunnel if needed."

Third engineer begins his presentation and says, "We will begin boring on both ends of the sea and meet in the middle. If successful, we'll connect the tubes and you'll have your tunnel. If we are not, then you'll have two tunnels."

1 votes

posted by "Veronica Sehnaz" |
$50.00 won 18 votes

A proud and confident genius makes a bet with an idiot. The genius says, "Hey idiot, every question I ask you that you don't know the answer, you have to give me $5. And if you ask me a question and I can't answer yours, I will give you $5,000."

The idiot replies, "Okay." The genius then asks, "How many continents are there in the world?" The idiot doesn't know and hands over the $5. The idiot says, "Now my turn, what animal stands with two legs but sleeps with three?"

The genius tries and searches very hard for the answer but gives up and hands over the $5000. The genius says, "Dang it, I lost. By the way, what was the answer to your question?"

The idiot hands over $5.

18 votes

posted by "mickey" |
1 votes

A dying grandma tells her grandchild, "I want to leave you my farm. That includes the barn, livestock, the harvest, the tractor, and other equipment, the farmhouse and $24,548,750.45 in cash."

The grandchild, absolutely floored and about to become rich says, "Oh grandma, you are SO generous! I didn't even know you had a farm. Where is it?"

With her last breath, Grandma whispered, "Facebook..." 

1 votes

posted by "tweetyr" |
2 votes

A physicist, a mathematician and a computer scientist discuss what is better: a wife or a girlfriend.

The physicist: "A girlfriend. You still have freedom to experiment."

The mathematician: "A wife. You have security."

The computer scientist: "Both. When I'm not with my wife, she thinks I'm with my girlfriend. With my girlfriend it's vice versa. Then I can be with my computer without anyone disturbing me." 

2 votes

posted by "tweetyr" |