misc jokes
Favorite this joke A woman was chatting with her next-door neighbor. "I feel really good today. I started out this morning with an act of unselfish generosity. I gave a twenty dollar bill to someone who was needy and down on his luck."
"Twenty whole dollars? That's a lot of money to just give away. What did your husband say about it?"
"Oh, he thought it was the proper thing to do. He said, 'Thanks.'"
I just love it when you are at a play or movie theater and they make the announcement, "Please silence your cell phones..."
Why do they have to announce that?
I mean how many people are carrying around a landline phone?
A man was walking down the street stealing loads of garden gates...
No one said anything in case he took a fence!
A woman has a problem with her closet door - it's falling out every time a bus passes by. So she calls a repairman.
The repairman comes and sees that indeed, the door falls out every time a bus passes by.
"OK, I'm going to take a look at this, just close the door behind me," and he steps into the closet.
At that time the husband comes home from work, opens the closet and finds the repairman.
Husband says, "What the heck are you doing here?"
Repairman replies, "You won't believe it, but I'm waiting for the bus."
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