"Bill's nowhere near the fool he was."
"Has he reformed?"
"No, he's dieting."
Fred: I’ve invented a truck that runs on water.
Ed: Why does it have such huge balloon tires?
Fred: So it can run on water.
Sometimes I feel like my life is a movie.
I can’t complain, it’s a wonderful life.
Besides I’m still here, it’s not like I’m gone with the wind.
Once upon a time, there lived a king who was only 12 inches tall...
He was a terrible king, but he made a great ruler.