The height of bad luck...
Your battery is at 2% and you see your boss upload pictures of himself and his family...
Wanting to impress him, you quickly comment "cool pics" but auto correct changes it to "cool pigs"...
Just as your battery runs out.
One of the most popular questions asked at our family restaurant is, “What’s good tonight?”
Now, we would never serve anything we didn’t think was good. So I braced myself one Saturday night when I heard the dreaded question posed to my husband.
He calmly replied, “Anything over $17.95.”
“Before they invented drawing boards, what did they go back to?”
Smith was always tired. After a while, he became known in the office for dozing off at his desk, sometimes even several times a day. Granted, he had a good reason. His wife had just had twins and he didn't get much sleep at home. But his boss was having none of it. He told Smith that if he was caught sleeping on the job one more time, he would be fired.
That same week, the boss decided to make a surprise visit at Smith's desk, to see if the situation had improved. You can imagine what happened next, he found Smith asleep.
But Smith was a quick thinker. He woke up just in time, remained in his position and calmly delivered the following line that saved his job: "... and I especially thank you for my excellent boss. Amen."