Latest Jokes

Did you hear about the Canadian man who had a map of Canada tattooed to his butt?

Every time he sat down, Quebec separated.

"Do you know why the golf pro tells you to keep your head down while swinging?"

"No, why?"

"It's so you can't see him laughing."

"My photographs don't do me any justice."

"How so?"

"They just look like me."

A police theft report stated that a farmer had lost 2,025 pigs. Thinking that to be an error, the officer called the farmer directly.

"Is it true, Mr. Smith, that you lost 2,025 pigs?" she asked.

"Yeth," lisped the farmer.

Being from that area herself, the officer clearly understood the farmer. She entered her report: "Subject lost 2 sows and 25 pigs."