Latest Jokes

One day three doctors went to a convention together, on the way back, they noticed the car was slowing down. They got out and looked at the tires. The first doctor said "I think its flat."

The second felt it and said "It feels flat."

The third stares at it and says "It looks flat."

All of them, without taking their eyes off the wheel, shook their heads and said in unison, "We better run some tests."

Did you hear about the new garlic diet?

You don't actually lose weight, but you look thinner from a distance.

Mr. and Mrs. Smith were always fighting. Then one morning as Mrs. Smith was driving around town, running some errands, her car was crashed into by a hit and run driver at a relatively low speed.

A police officer rushed up and asked her if she'd taken the car's number.

"I didn't need to," replied Mrs. Smith. "It was my husband in that car."

"Did you see him?" asked the officer.

"No," said Mrs. Smith, "but I'd recognize that laugh anywhere."

There are a lot of folks who can't understand how we came to have an oil shortage here in America. Well, there's a very simple answer. Nobody bothered to check the oil.

We just didn't know we were getting low. The reason for that is purely geographical.

All our oil is in Alaska, Texas, California, and Oklahoma...

All our dipsticks are in Washington, DC!