What’s the best present you can gift?
A broken drum.
Nobody can beat that.
What do you call an eagle who can play the piano?
Talonted!
What's the difference between a rock guitarist and a jazz guitarist?
A rock guitarist plays 4 notes in front of 1000 people, while a jazz guitarist plays 1000 notes in front of 4 people.
I was just on the phone with a company that said I won my choice of either $500 or tickets to see an Elvis Presley tribute band...
I had to press 1 for the money or 2 for the show!