Best Jokes

Why is it called a 'Picnic'?
Betty Sue wanted to eat outside on a hot summer day with her boyfriend. Problem: she had two boyfriends, Fred and Nick. Considering she knew she wouldn't have a very happy lunch if the two boys were arguing, she decided just to choose one boy to have the meal.
She Picked Nick.

A teacher in a political science class asked the students, "Who is the most powerful person in the US?"
A student answered, "The First Pet?"
The teacher then asked, "Why?"
The student explained, "Because, the president kneels before him, talks to him, listens to him, follows him, prefers him to office staff, looks after his wellbeing before the voters', cancels/defers official duties in favor of him, and boards Airforce One first."

An independent voter was exploring the candidates and their parties.
He asked a campaigner of a party, "who represents your candidate?"
The campaigner answered, "Donkey".
The voter asked a campaigner of another party the same question.
The campaigner answered, "Elephant".
The voter then asked his wife, "who should I vote for - Donkey or Elephant?"
The wife suggested, "either one; both are same - animals."

A police man pulls over a drunk driver for not stopping at a stop sign and asks the driver if he saw the stop sign. The driver replies "I did but it turned red too fast for me to stop."