Best Jokes

The newlywed said to her husband. "I'm not cleaning up after you.
I'm a career woman. That means I pay other people to do housework.
"How much?"
"Eight dollars and hour. Take it or leave it"

A college professor walked into a bas and said, “Bring me a martinus.”
The bartender smiled and said, “You mean martini?”
“If I want more than one,” snapped the professor, “I’ll order them”

Teacher to a student: "Can you think of a solution to end unemployment?"
"Yes, sir! I'd put all the men on one island and the women on another."
"And what would they be doing then?"
"Building boats!"

Q. What's te definition of a bachelor pad?
A. All the house plants are dead, but there's something growing in the refrigerator.