Little Johnny: I’m so glad you named me Little Johnny.
Mother: Why do you say that?
Little Johnny: Because that’s what all the kids in school call me.
A lady came to an IT shop and asked the shop assistant, “Do you have Bark-code equipment?”
The shop assistant was confused and answered, “Madam, you probably mean a Bar-code reader, don't you?”
The lady said, “No, I want to understand why my dog is barking at me!”
The Law of Volunteering"
If you dance with a grizzly bear, you had better let him lead.
"The Law of Avoiding Oversell"
When putting cheese in a mousetrap, always leave room for the mouse.
"The Law of Common Sense"
Never accept a drink from a urologist.
"The Law of Reality"
Never get into fights with less attractive people, they have less to lose.
"The Law of Self Sacrifice"
When you starve with a tiger, the tiger starves last.
"Weiler's Law"
Nothing is impossible for the man who doesn't have to do it himself.
"Law of Probable Dispersal"
Whatever hits the fan will not be evenly distributed.
"Law of Volunteer Labor"
People are always available for work in the past tense.
"Conway's Law"
In any organization there is one person who knows what is going on. That person must be fired.
"Iron Law of Distribution"
Them that has, gets.
"Law of Cybernetic Entomology"
There is always one more bug.
"Law of Drunkenness"
You can't fall off the floor.