Latest Jokes

A mime was arrested and put into an invisible cell at the police station.

They figured if he can't get out of an invisible box on a stage, an invisible prison cell would be twice as difficult.

An elegant older lady is ushered into the most prestigious party at the country club. This is the first time out making an appearance since the wedding. Her new husband just happens to be the founder & president of the club.

When she came into view, there was a low hum among the other women as they gathered round full of questions, especially about the HUGE diamond on her finger. The madame tried to be nice about it all but was getting a little annoyed with all the busy bodies. She told them that the diamond was the Cloppman Diamond and it came with a curse.

Now the hum was getting louder as they wanted to know what the curse was.

She responded, matter of factly, "Mr. Cloppman!"

If you're becoming forgetful, I have a tip for you.

Date the notes you write to yourself.

I just spent the entire morning looking for Easter eggs.

Q: Why is a fish easy to weigh?

A: Because it has its own scales!