Latest Jokes

The Lone Ranger and Tonto were riding across the desert when a line of mounted Indians appeared to the right of them. They looked to the left and saw another line of mounted Indians. Behind them they saw another line of mounted Indians.
The Lone Ranger said, "Looks like we're in trouble, Tonto."
Tonto replied, "What do you mean WE, white man?"

Little Johnny came downstairs bellowing lustily. His mother asked, “What’s the matter now?” “Dad was hanging pictures, and just hit his thumb with a hammer,” said Johnny through his tears. “That’s not so serious,” soothed his mother. “I know you are upset, but a big boy like you shouldn’t cry at something like that. Why didn’t you laugh?” “I did!” sobbed Johnny.

Mr. White and his wife went for a gathering. At commencement of the program, the MC said the people were going to be grouped into two. He said "those whose wives' are the head of the family move to the left-hand side of the auditorium, while those whose husbands are the head of the family should move to the right". Mr. White asked his wife "Honey, which group should we move to?"

A mother and a daughter are visiting a deceased family member in a graveyard. On the way out the daughter asks why they bury two people in one grave. The mother asks her daughter why she says that and the daughter replies, "Well, that gravestone says 'Here lays a lawyer and an honest man.'"