Latest Jokes

When the waitress in a New York City restaurant brought him the soup of the day, the Englishman was a bit dismayed. "Good heavens," he said, "what is this?"

"It's bean soup," she replied.

"I don't care what it's been," he replied. "I want to know what it is now?"

A woman with a headache went to her medicine cabinet to find a bottle of Advil She did as the bottle said; take two and keep away from children. Soon her headache went away!

This scientist was telling a colleague, "I have worked for many years
to develop an acid that would eat anything and I finally did it.” So I invested everything I had and could borrow into it.
“You must have made a fortune,” commented his friend. “No! I lost all my investments. I couldn't find anything to ship it in.” replied the scientist.

Government Philosophy: If it ain't broke, fix it 'till it is.