Latest Jokes

To everyone amazement the middle-aged spinster announced her engagement.
“But I thought you said all men were stupid,” said one friend, “and that you’d never marry!
“Yes, I did, she replied, “but then I found one who asked me.”

Mrs. Sullivan and her little daughter Patty were outside the church watching all the comings and goings of a wedding. After the photographs had been taken, everyone had driven off to the reception, and all the excitement was over. Patty asked her mother, “Why did the bride change her mind, Mommy?
“How do you mean, change her min?” asked Mrs. Sullivan.
“Well said the child, “she went into the church with one man and came out with another!”

“I saw you kissing my sister last night!” jeered the brat to the embarrassed teenager.
“All right all right! Not so loud,” said the youth. “Here’s fifty cents to keep your mouth shut.”
“Gee, thank! Wait a minute and I’ll give you twenty cents change.”
“Twenty cents change? What for?”
“I like to be fair,” said the youngster, “and it’s the same price for everybody!”

One friend says to another, “I think my wife is trying to tell me something.”

"Why do you say that?

“She keeps wrapping my sandwiches in a road map.”