If a flea and a fly pass each other, what time is it?
Fly past flea.
To everyone amazement the middle-aged spinster announced her engagement.
“But I thought you said all men were stupid,” said one friend, “and that you’d never marry!
“Yes, I did, she replied, “but then I found one who asked me.”
On their first evening in their new home the bride went in to the kitchen to fix drinks. Five minutes later she came back into the living room in tears.
“What’s the matter, my angel?” asked her husband anxiously.
“Oh, Steven! She sobbed, “I put the ice cubes in hot water to wash them and now they’ve disappeared!”
Mr. and Mrs. Smith were celebrating their silver anniversary with a big party, at which the center of attraction was a huge cake. “This cake was made by my wife’s fair hands,” said Mr. Smith proudly. “Every year on our anniversary she makes a cake, and I like to think of them as milestones on our journey through life ….”