marriage jokes

Harry and Esther are out shopping one morning when
Esther says, "Darling, it's my mother's birthday
tomorrow. What shall we buy for her? She said she
would like something electric."

Harry replies, "How about a chair?"

A newlywed is trying to console his little bride, who sprawled, dissolved in tears on the couch. “Darling’” he implored, “Believe me. I never said you were a terrible cook. I merely pointed out that our garbage disposal has developed an ulcer.”

The frugal man walked into the house panting and almost completely exhausted. “What happened, Honey?” asked his wife.

“It’s a great new idea I have,” he gasped. “I ran all the way home behind the bus and saved $1.50 cents.”

“That wasn’t too smart,” replied his wife. “Why didn’t you run behind a taxi and save ten dollars?”

A newly wed couple had just had an argument coming home from the reception. Driving along in silence they pass a farm with all kinds of animals on it. Breaking the silence, the husband asks: "Relatives?" and without missing a beat the wife replies: "Yes, in-laws."