misc jokes

"All those curves and me with no brakes."

Two guys on a double bike where pedaling up a hill. It took forever to get to the top. When they finally got to the top the first guy said in a pant, "whew, that was so hard." The second replied, "If I hadn't been pushing the brakes the whole time we would have rolled down backwards.”

What is the best time to go to bed?
When the bed won’t come to you.

“What are you learning at school now, Sue? Asked her Granny.
“French, German, and we’ve just started Algebra.”
“Really?” said the old lady, impressed. “I used to learn French and German but
I have never heard anyone speak Algebra.”