misc jokes

A cowboy rides into town on Friday, stays three days and leaves on Friday how does he do it?

The horses name is Friday

At a party an elderly lady was bemoaning the behavior of the youth of today.
“Look at the girl over there,” she complained. “I don’t know what young girls are coming to! She’s wearing boy’s jeans, a boy’s shirt, and that haircut is so boyish – you wouldn’t know she was a girl at all, would you?”
“Well, as it happens, I would,” came the reply, “because she is my daughter.”
“Oh dear,” said the old lady embarrassed, “I’m so sorry – I didn’t know you were her father.”
“I’m not, I’m her mother.”

“Doctor, doctor! My family thinks I’m mad!”
“Why is that?”
“I like sausages.”
“There’s nothing strange about that. I like sausages too.”
“Really? You must come and see my collection – I’ve got
thousands!”

"Doctor, doctor, I feel like a goat.”

“How long have you been like this?”

“Since I was a kid.”