misc jokes

One year my uncle decided to cheat on his income taxes. The problem was that he later started to feel so guilty that he couldn’t sleep. After thinking about if for a while, he sent an anonymous cashier’s check for $100 to the IRS along with a note that read:

To Whom It May Concern,

I cheated on my taxes and now I feel so guilty that I haven’t been able to sleep for weeks, so I’m sending you this check for one hundred dollars. I hope you forgive me.

P.S. If I still can’t sleep after one week, I’ll send you the rest of what I owe.

You must think with a clean mind... What does a man do standing up, a woman does sitting down, a dog does with his leg lifted?

Why shaking hands!

Three men were shipwrecked on a desert island and where captured by the local natives. They were brought to the chief native. The chief gave the men two choices; they could have death or submit to unga bunga. The first man decides he does not want to die, so he chooses unga bunga. Ten of the natives took him into the woods, when he came back one hour later he was all beaten up. The second man chooses unga bunga and he was taken out the woods for 2 hours where the natives beat him up. The third man not wanting to go through all that torture decided upon death. So the chief said ok death by Unga Bunga

A police recruit was asked during the exam, "What would you do if you
had to arrest your own mother?"
He said: "Call for backup."