"Frank, if you have 20 dollars and Bill takes away 14. What would you have?” said the teacher.
"A fight!” answers Frank.
A Student wanting to measure something asks his teacher, "Sir, do you have a ruler?"
"Yes," answers the teacher, "She's at home watching the kids."
Father: Why did you get such a low score in that exam?
Father: You were absent on the day of the exam?
Son: No but the boy who sits next to me was!
Son: Daddy, I got punished in school today.
Son: My teacher pointed the scale towards me saying, "At the end of this scale there is an idiot.".
I just asked "Which end?".