Best Jokes

Last night I left my dentures under my pillow by accident. The Tooth Fairy must have come by because she left me a pile of Monopoly money with a note saying, "Nice try."

A man with a gun is robbing a bank. He asks one of the bank customers if he saw him rob the bank. The guy says he did. The robber then shoots him in the head killing him immediately. The robber then asks a couple nearest to him the same thing. The husband says that he didn't but his wife did.

For poker playing plumbers, a flush beats a full house.

Q: How can you determine when the portable stage is level?

A: The drummer will be drooling equally out of both corners of his mouth.