Best Jokes

Einstein developed a theory about space... and it was about time too!

An indian man was walking down the road when he suddenly had a heart attack and fell to the ground. And ambulance was called and within minutes the ambulance arrived. The victim was taken into the ambulance and it sped off. In the ambulance the victim being a religious man started to repeat "hari om, hari hom, ari om"

The ambulance drove as fast as it could siren sounding and lights flashing. Finally it arrived! They took the victim down and pushed him to the door and rang the doorbell. A woman appeared and was shocked to see her husband on stretcher and inquired what happened. The medical officer explained what happened to her. She screamed," why didn't you take him to the hospital!?"

The medical officer explained, " we tried too but he kept repeating "hurry home hurry home hurry home'. So we took him right to his home.'

The wife was furious and exclaimed, "you idiot! He was praying our hindu prayer "hari om hari om!'

Did you ever hear of a Jewish Wine?

"I wanna go to Florida!!!"

An escaped convict broke into a house and tied up the young couple who lived there. They had been sleeping so he just tied them to the bed.

As soon as he had a chance, the husband turned to his wife, bound up on the bed in her skimpy nightgown, and whispered, "Honey, this guy hasn't been with a woman in years. Just cooperate with anything he wants. If he wants to have sex with you, just go along with it and pretend you like it. Our lives depend on it."

She hissed and spit out her gag and said, "I'm so relieved you feel that way, because he just told me he thinks you are really cute!"