Best Jokes

A fisherman accidentally left his day’s catch under the seat of a bus. The next evening’s newspaper carried an ad: “If the person who left a bucket of fish on the No. 47 bus would care to come to the garage, he can have the bus.”

First golfer: “I have the greatest golf ball in the world. You can’t lose it.”
Second golfer: “How so?”
First golfer: “If you hit it into the sand, it beeps. You hit it into the water, it floats.
If you want to play golf at night it glows.”
Second golfer: “Hey, sounds good. Where did you get it?”
First golfer: “I found it in the woods.”

Two would-be fishermen rented a boat, and one caught a large fish.
“We should mark the spot,” he said. The other man drew a large
X in the bottom of the boat with a black maker
“That’s no good,” said the first man. “Next time out we may not get the same boat.”

A hunting party is hopelessly lost.

“I thought you said you were the best guide in Maine!” one of the hunters angrily said to their confused leader.

“I am,“ replied the guide. “But I think we’re in Canada now.”