Latest Jokes
Favorite this joke Me: I taught my dog to play chess.
Friend: He must be very smart?
Me: Not really, I beat him two games out of three!
On day when returning home from work my wife proceeded to tell me that she had been called into the principal's office because of the things OUR SON had done at school that day.
We agreed that he should be disciplined the same was I was disciplined when I was his age: being sent to my room without supper.
But in my son's room, he has his own color TV, telephone, computer, and CD player. So what is a parent to do in this day and age?
We sent him to MY room!
When I was growing up, I used to watch M*A*S*H. It was on for eleven seasons. It was about the Korean War.
Years later in high school, in my history class, the teacher asked us, “How long did the Korean War last?”
I raised my hand, and answered, “Eleven years.”
Needless to say, I got an F in history.
A friend of mine went on safari in Africa when he comes across an elephant. It's lying on the ground in distress. He investigates and finds a thorn in its foot. He removes it and the elephant happily trots away.
Twenty years later we were in London on business and were watching a circus procession pass by. When along comes an elephant, as it gets level with him, it stops, looks straight at him, reaches out with its trunk and lift him into the air and smashes him into the ground.
It was a different elephant.
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