Latest Jokes

Q: What do you call an intelligent, attractive, sensitive man?

A: A rumor

Three contractors are bidding to fix a broken fence at the Rhode Island State house in Providence, one from Cranston, and another from North Kingstown and the third, Exeter. They go with a State house official to examine the fence.
The North Kingstown contractor takes out a tape measure and does some Measuring, then works some figures with a pencil. "Well," he says, "I figure the job will run about $900: $400 for materials, $400 for my crew and $100 profit for me."
The Exeter contractor also does some measuring and figuring, and then says I can do this job for $700: $300 for materials, $300 for my crew and $100 profit for me."
The Cranston contractor doesn't measure or figure, but leans over to the State House official and whispers, "$2,700."
The official, incredulous, says, "You didn't even measure like the other guys! How did you come up with such a high figure?"
The Cranston contractor whispers back, "$1,000 for me, $1,000 for you, and we hire the guy from Exeter to fix the fence."

This fellow was a very good harp player and wound up playing a gig in San Francisco, at a pub named Sam Fran's Disco. When his gig was up and he returned home, he found out he had forgotten his harp. When he told his wife he had to go right back, she wanted to know why. He said, "Because I left my harp in Sam Fran's Disco".

Did you know the most difficult job in the US Military is being a Navy Pilot?
I guess it is really hard to make the boats fly!