Latest Jokes

An antelope and a lion entered a diner and took a booth near the window. When the waiter approached, the antelope said, “I’ll have a bowl of hay and a side order of radishes.”

“And what would your friend have?”

“Nothing,” replied the antelope.

The waiter persisted, “Isn’t he hungry?”

“Hey, if he were hungry,” said the antelope, “would I be sitting here?”

“He’s great on the court,” a sportswriter said of a college basketball player in an interview with his coach, “but how’s his scholastic work?”

“Why, he makes straight A’s,” replied the coach.

“Wonderful!” said the sportswriter.

“Yes,” agreed the coach, “but his B’s are a little crooked.”

I have a new job, telling people about the benefits of dried grapes...

I am raisin awareness!

My friends from New York talk about how tough their schools were. I’m not impressed. I'm from Texas.

My school had it’s own coroner.

We used to write essays like: “What I want to be IF I grow up...”