Latest Jokes

This guy is at the airport waiting for his flight which leaves at 6:00 but he has forgotten his watch, so he looks for someone to ask the time. He spots this guy walking past carrying two suitcases and sporting this fabulous hi-tech watch, so he asks him for the time. The guy replies, "Sure. Which country?"

Our fella asks, "How many countries have you got?" to which the reply is "All the countries in the world!"

"Wow! That's a pretty cool watch you've got there."

"That's nothing. This watch also has a GPS facility, fax, e-mail and can even receive NTSC television channels and display them on its miniature active color pixel LCD screen!"

"Boy, that's incredible. I wish I had a watch like that one... You wouldn't consider selling it by any chance?"

"Well, actually the novelty has worn off by now, so for $900, if you want it, it's yours!"

Our watch-less traveler can hardly whip out his check book fast enough, and hands over a check for $900.

The seller takes off the watch and gives it to him. "Congratulations, here is you new hi-tech watch!" and then handing the two suitcases over as well he says, "and here are the batteries!"

In a physics course, which involved light, electricity and magnetism, the students were required to read the week's experiment before coming to class. At one lab session the student assistant wanted to see how many of his pupils had actually done so.

"What are the two types of light?" he asked.

The lab fell quiet until one wise guy raised his hand and said, "Uhhh, Actually there are three: Bud, Coors and Miller!"