relationship jokes

Two magnets were having a conversation. "I went on a blind date yesterday"

"Oh really…how did it go?"

"Unfortunately, not so well."

"Why not?"

"There was no attraction."

To make sure I won't be late for work, my girlfriend calls me on the phone every morning to wake me up.

Wouldn't it be easier for her to just lean over, start shaking me, and yell, 'HEY! WAKE UP!'?

So I didn't appear to be a loser, I concocted a story to tell my friends, about my having a girlfriend who lets me put lipstick and rouge on her.

In other words, not only did I make her up, I MADE her up!

Two girlfriends were talking to each other about relationships. "I put an ad in one of those singles websites looking for a boyfriend."

"What kind of guy did you say you were looking for?"

"I wanted an ambitious guy who likes to dig in to get the job done and is really down to earth. I think I found him."

"So what does he do?"

"He's a grave digger."