relationship jokes
Favorite this joke The girlfriend stands by door, not sure what to say. “Honey, why is your whole upper half covered in baby oil?”
“Well, you’re always saying I never glisten,” replies the boyfriend.
“Listen! I said you never LISTEN!”
At a restaurant one night, the man at the next table was pulling out all the stops to impress his underwhelmed date.
He crowned a lengthy list of lifetime achievements by stating, “At least I can say I have been a Hollywood movie producer.”
The woman nodded. “I’ll make a note of that: ‘has-been movie producer.'”
A father texts his son: "My dear son, today is a day you will treasure for all the days of your life. My best love and good wishes. Your Father."
His son texts back: "Thanks Dad. But the wedding isn't actually until tomorrow!"
His Father replies: "I know."
Wife: Whatcha doing?
Me: Nothing.
Wife: You did that yesterday.
Me: I wasn't finished.
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