Best Jokes

Teacher: "Now, Susan, how may fingers have you?"

Susan: "Ten."

Teacher: "Right. Now if you lost four of them, what would you have?"

Susan: "No more piano lessons."

Mo attends a revival and listens to the sermon. After a while, the pastor asks anyone with needs to come forward and be prayed over. Mo gets in line and when it’s his turn, the pastor asks, “Mo, what do you want me to pray about?”

Mo says, “Pastor, I need you to pray for my hearing.”

So the pastor puts one finger in Mo’s ear and the other hand on top of his head and prays for a while. He removes his hands and says, “Mo how’s your hearing now?”

Mo says, “I don’t know pastor, it’s not until next Monday."

Two roofers, Larry and Joe, were on the roof laying tile, when a sudden win gust came and knocked down their ladder.

“I have an idea,” said Larry. “We’ll throw you down, and then you can pick up the ladder.”

"What, do you think, that I’m stupid?" replied Joe. “I have and idea! I’ll shine my flashlight, and you can climb down on the beam of light.”

Larry wasn't having it. "What, do you think that I’m stupid? You’ll just turn off the flashlight when I’m halfway down.”

Read this from Readers Digest a long time ago: One day a Cowpoke riding the plains, came upon a warrior with his head down on the ground with his ear on a wagon track, the warrior looked up at the cowpoke and said" Wagon with two horses, one black, one white, man with beard drive, smoke pipe, women ride, wear blue dress with bonnet" the cowpoke looks at the warrior and said" you mean you can tell me all that just by listening to a wagon track? The warrior looked up and replied, "No! Run over me half hour ago...