Best Jokes

A young blonde goes to the doctor and says I hurt all over. The doctor says point to where you hurt.

She points to her elbow and says "OW!"

Then points to her head and says "OW" and then finally points to her leg and says "OW!"

The doctor says I have it figured out you have a broken finger.

My Toy Pomeranian got ate by my grumpy old cat. I hated it and I loved the little guy!

A few days later the cat coughed the little hairball up!

Hey, he lost a few pounds and looks pretty good!

Why is Christmas like a day at the office?

Because, you do all the work and the fat guy in the suit gets all the credit.

A man stands at the bar boasting that he has a dog that is the greatest fighter of all and will beat any dog in a fight and to prove this offers a prize of a $1,000 if his dog can be beaten.

An old man sitting near by says my Terrier will beat your dog no problem!

So the man immediately sets up a fight between the two dogs.

In the ring the two dogs are thrown in and the man's dog growls and starts to bite the other dog with its massive teeth for the terrier to flick itself around and snap the neck of the dog and then devour it whole!

True to his word the man counts out the grand and hands it over saying “just what type of Terrier is that?”

The old man puts the money in his pocket and replies “a long tailed short haired snub nose Terrier or Alligator for short.”