Best Jokes

The census taker knocked on Miss Gibson’s door. She answered all his questions except one. She refused to tell him her age. “But everybody tells their age to the census taker,” the man said. “Did Miss Mary Hill and Miss Patty Hill tell you their ages?”
“Certainly.” Well, I’m the same age as they are,” she snapped. “As old as the Hills,” the man wrote on his form.

A kindergarten teacher asked, "What is the shape of the earth?”

After a pause a little girl spoke up, “According to my Daddy…terrible!”

"You see, doctor, I’m always dizzy for half an hour after I get up in the morning,” said Carla.

"I have the solution for you," replied the doctor.

"Really, what is it?"

“Well, try getting up half an hour later."

A man was driving the wrong way down a one-way street.

He was stopped by a policeman. “This is a one-way street,” said the officer.

“I know,” said the motorist, “I’m only going one way.”