Best Jokes

Four members of the clergy had a theological argument, with the three males ministers siding against the female minister. The woman prayed, "Lord, I know I'm right. Please send us a divine sign to prove it."

A big storm cloud materialized and there was a clap of thunder. "See," said the woman. "It's a sign from above." The three clergymen disagreed, saying thunder is a common phenomenon.

"Dear Lord," the woman prayed, "I need a bigger sign." This time, a bolt of lightning slammed into a tree. "See! I told you I was right," the woman said. But the men insisted nothing had happened that couldn't be explained by natural causes.

"Help me, Lord," the woman implored. And a deep voice came from the heavens: "SSSHHHEEE'S RRRIIIGGGHHHTTT!"

The woman turned to the three clergymen and asked, "Well?"

"Okay, okay," they said. "Now it's three against two."

After being locked in an impenetrable strongroom, a panicked Dr. Watson cries, "How are we to escape, Holmes?"

Calmly, the sleuth produces a small knife and a lemon, which he carefully cuts into small pieces. He then sticks the pieces of lemon on the wall in the shape of a door, and with a push creates a doorway.

An astonished Watson asks, "How on earth did you do that, Holmes?"

"Lemon-entry my dear Watson, Lemon-entry!"