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Favorite this joke How do you get the farmer’s daughter to fall in love with you?
A tractor.
After being locked in an impenetrable strongroom, a panicked Dr. Watson cries, "How are we to escape, Holmes?"
Calmly, the sleuth produces a small knife and a lemon, which he carefully cuts into small pieces. He then sticks the pieces of lemon on the wall in the shape of a door, and with a push creates a doorway.
An astonished Watson asks, "How on earth did you do that, Holmes?"
"Lemon-entry my dear Watson, Lemon-entry!"
A boy, frustrated with all the rules he had to follow, asked his father, "Dad, how soon will I be old enough to do whatever I want?"
The father answered immediately, "I don't know. Nobody has lived that long yet."
A good piece of chocolate has about 200 calories. As I enjoy two servings per night and a few more on weekends, I consume 3,500 calories of chocolate in a week, which equals to one pound of weight per week.
Therefore, in the last three and a half years, I have had a chocolate caloric intake of about 180 pounds. I only weigh 165 pounds, so without chocolate, I would have wasted away to nothing about three months ago.
I owe my life to chocolate!
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