Latest Jokes

The teacher asks Suzy where her nose is, and Suzy points to it. Next, she asks Freddy where his ears are, and he points to them. Then she asked little johnny where his heart is, johnny points to his behind,

The teacher said, "No, that is not right. Let's try again. Where is your heart?"

Again, Johnny points to his behind and explains, "Every time my grandma comes over she give me a hug, pats my behind, and says 'Bless your heart.'"

"Mary, if you were a four legged animal and you were pregnant for two years, what would you give birth to?"

"I don't know," said Mary, "but whatever it is, it would never be afraid of the dark."

Why did the diet coach send her new client to the paint store?

She knew you could get thinner there!

"Walter, if you are going to make a parachute jump, at least how high should you be?"

"Three days of steady drinking should do it," was Walter's reply.