Latest Jokes

Two elderly sisters donated $5 to a charity and, to their surprise, won tickets to a football game. Since they had never seen a live football game before, Madge thought the free tickets would provide an excellent opportunity for doing so.

"I think so, too," said Mabel. "Let's go!"

They soon found themselves high in a noisy stadium overlooking a large, grassy expanse. They watched the kickoff and the seemingly endless back-and-forth struggles that comprised the scoreless first half.

They enjoyed the band music and cheerleader performance that followed. Then came the second half. When the teams lined up for the second-half kickoff, Madge nudged her sister.

"I guess we can go home now, Mabel," she said. "This is where we came in."

I can learn something new everyday...

Of course I also forget five other things!

A husband and wife were at the mall when they got separated. The wife calls him on her cell phone. "Where are you?" she asks.

"Well, do you remember the store when we were first married and you were looking at a beautiful ring in the jewelry store window, but we could not afford it?"

"Yes", she replies, excited to think about what he was about to say, a tear forming in her eyes.

"Great, I am at the sports store right next to it."