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Favorite this joke An Irishman was flustered not being able to find a parking space in a large mall's parking lot. "Lord," he prayed, "I can't stand this. If you open a space up for me, I swear I'll give up drinking me whiskey, and I promise to go to church every Sunday."
Suddenly, the clouds parted and the sun shone on an empty parking spot. Without hesitation, the man said, "Never mind, I found one."
"When I walk into a room, I expect your undivided attention. Don't look over here or over there, look at me. If you say something to me, I just may want to ignore you. That's my prerogative. In addition, when I utter so much as a sound, you are to smile, nod approvingly, and praise me."
Sounds like your boss, right?
Well, you're half right. I'm also your cat!
“That’s a nice plant,” said a woman at the florist’s shop, pointing to the flower I was buying.
“Yeah, my wife and I had an argument,” I admitted. “I was going to buy her a dozen roses, but I don’t think she’s that mad at me.”
While volunteering in a soup kitchen, I hit it off with a very attractive, single man. It was a relief since my mother and I always laughed at the fact that the men I was drawn to were inevitably married.
So, optimistic about my chances, I asked my new friend what he did for a living.
He replied, “I’m a priest.”
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