Latest Jokes

Joey goes into a pharmacy and says to the pharmacist, "Hello, could you give me condom please? I'm going to my girlfriend's place for dinner and I think I may be getting lucky tonight."

The Pharmacist gives him the condom but as soon as he does Joey tells him, "Give me another condom because my girlfriends sister is also very cute too and always crosses her legs in a provocative manner when I am around, I think I might get lucky with her too."

The Pharmacist gives him another condom and as he was about to leave Joey returned and requested for a third.

"My girlfriend's mom is really cute and she always makes eye contact when I'm around and since she invited me for dinner I think she might be expecting me to make a move."

During the dinner Joey sits down with his girlfriend on the right, her sister on the left and her mom facing him. When the dad walks in. Joey lowers his and starts the dinner prayer.

"Dear Lord bless this dinner and thank you for all you've given us..." Ten minutes later Joey is still praying. His girlfriend now surprised gets close to him and whispers, "I didn't know you where this religious."

Joey with his head still bowed in prayer replied "I never knew your dad was a Pharmacist!"

My Grandma's sense of humor has always been her strongest attribute.

She was mugged a few years ago, unfortunately. As the young punk held her up and demanded all her money, she said, "I don't have any money."

"I don't believe you! I'm gonna search you! " he sneered. So he started patting her down all over really well.

"I guess you don't have any money..." he said disappointed.

"I told you," my Grandma replied. "But if you do that again, I'll write you a check!"

Two guys are walking down the street when a mugger approaches them and demands their money.

They both grudgingly pull out their wallets and begin taking out their cash. Just then one guy turns to the other and hands him a bill. "Here’s that $20 I owe you," he says.