Latest Jokes

Three men were sitting on a park bench. The one in the middle was reading a newspaper; the others were pretending to fish. They baited imaginary hooks, cast lines, and reeled in their catch.
A passing policeman stopped to watch the spectacle and asked the man in the middle if he new the other two.
“Oh yes” he said. “They ‘re my friends.”
“In that case,” warned the officer, “you’d better get them out of here!”
“Yes, sir” the man replied, and he began rowing furiously

When a fellow called a motel and asked how much they charged for a room, the clerk told him that the rates depended on room size and number of people. “Do you take children?” the man asked.
“No, sir,” replied the clerk. “Only cash and credit cards.”

So Bill Gates and the chairman of GM are arguing over which company is better. Bill Gates boast, " If cars grew in technology as fast as computers did, we would be driving v-32 instead of v-8, our cars would get 5000 miles to the gallon, the top speed would be mach seven. Anyway the sticker price for a car would be 50 dollars."

And which the GM replies, " Sure, but would you really want a car that crashes 4 times a day!"

Two prisoners were making their escape over the jailhouse roof when one of them dislodged a tile. “Who’s there?" shouted a guard.

The first prisoner replied with a convincing imitation of a cat’s meow. Reassured, the guard when back to his rounds. But then the second prisoner dislodged another tile.

The guard repeated, “Who’s there?”

“The other cat,” answered the prisoner.