One friend says to another, “My husband is man of rate gifts.”
“That’s nice.”
“He hasn’t given me a present in twenty-five years of marriage…”
“How are you getting on with your football, Jack?”
“Well, Dad, pretty good. The coach said I was one of the team’s greatest drawbacks!”
“Dad, the career counselor said that with a mind like mine I should study criminal law.”
“That is wonderful, son. I’m proud of you.”
“He said I had a criminal mind.”
Q: Under law, what is the maximum penalty for bigamy?
A: Two mothers-in-law.