The local pastor was making his annual visit and was invited to dinner at the Brown family. As Mr. and Mrs. Brown prepared dinner in the kitchen, the pastor was sitting with their five year old son in living room.
The pastor asked the boy what he expected they were going to have for dinner. The boy immediately replied, "goat".
Thinking this was rather strange he asked, "What makes you think we are going to have goat for dinner?"
The boy replied, "I heard dad tell mom they were having the old goat for dinner tonight."
A priest was walking down the sidewalk and saw a young boy pouring a liquid back and forth between two glasses. When he asked the boy what he was playing with, the boy told him that it was sulfuric acid. Horrified the priest took our his Holy water and offered to exchange with the boy.
When the boy said no, the priest tried to convince the boy that the holy water was better by telling him he had just put some of his Holy water on the tummy of a woman and she had passed a baby. The boy said, "That's nothing, I accidentally dropped some of this on the tail of a cat and he passed a bus."
One Spring afternoon, I came home to find two little girls on the steps of my building. Both were crying hard, shedding big tears. Thinking they might be hurt, I dropped my briefcase and quickly went over to them. "Are you all right?" I asked.
Still sobbing, one held up her doll. "My baby's arm came off," she said.
I took the doll and its disjointed arm. After a little effort and luck, the doll was again whole. "Thank you," came a whisper from the girl as I handed her the doll back. Next, looking into the tearful eyes of her friend, I asked, "And what's the matter with you, young lady?"
She wiped her cheeks and said, "Oh I'm okay, I was just helping her cry."
As I was going to visit a friend, I saw my neighbor’s little child at the street corner holding two dollars and crying. I asked him, ”Junior, what is the matter?”
He replied, ”My mummy gave me one dollar to buy sugar and one dollar to buy soy milk, and now I can't remember which dollar is for sugar and which dollar is for the milk.”