misc jokes
Favorite this joke A not-so-smart lady called the airline booking agent to ask how long a flight was from Los Angeles to New York?
The busy agent replied, "Just a moment."
The not-so-smart lady replied, "Thank you," and then hung up.
The day I immigrated to the United States, I was given an alien ID card that featured a cute photo of me at age 15. Years later, when I went to the courthouse to become a citizen, a clerk confiscated my card.
"What will you do with it?" my wife asked.
"We burn it," was the answer.
"Could you please cut the photo off and let us keep it?" asked my wife.
"Certainly not," said the clerk. "This card is official U.S. government property. As such it cannot be mutilated before it's destroyed."
My next door neighbor is originally from Canada. This past February we had what we call here in Oklahoma a blizzard.
I was discussing the 'blizzard' with my neighbor and ask how this compared to Canada.
His reply, "We call this July."
My friend Kimberly announced that she had started a diet to lose some pounds she had put on recently.
“Good!” I exclaimed. “I’m ready to start a diet too. We can be dieting buddies and help each other out. When I feel the urge to drive out and get a burger and fries, I’ll call you first.”
“Great!” she replied. “I’ll ride with you.”
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