misc jokes

A mime was arrested and put into an invisible cell at the police station.

They figured if he can't get out of an invisible box on a stage, an invisible prison cell would be twice as difficult.

An angry motorist went back to a garage where he had purchased an expensive battery for his car just six months earlier.

"Listen", the motorist grumbled to the owner of the garage, "when I bought this battery you said it would be the last battery my car would ever need. It died after only six months!"

"Sorry," apologized the garage owner. "I didn't think your car would last longer than that."

Two friends were going on a road trip to Florida. A neighbor told them that they'd be fine as long as they paid close attention to the road signs along the way.

They'd driven 30 miles when they saw one that read, "Clean Restrooms Ahead".

Two months later they arrived in Florida exhausted, having used up 86 bottles of Windex, 267 rolls of paper towels, and three cases of toilet-bowl cleaner. Total restrooms cleaned: 450.

I took to heart my doctors suggestion to get more exercise...

Only problem was I thought he said, "EXTRA FRIES!"