religious jokes

A mother asked her little boy what he’d learned that day in Sunday school. He said it was about a cross-eyed bear named Gladly.

Mother: "Really?"

Little Boy: "Yes. Gladly, the cross I’d bear."

I found a wallet with 20 dollars in it. I wasn't sure how to proceed, but then I thought, "What would Jesus do?"

So I turned it into wine.

A minister had all of his remaining teeth pulled out. New dentures were being made. The first Sunday, he only preached 10 minutes. The second Sunday, he preached only 20 minutes. On the third Sunday, he preached 1 hour 25 minutes.

When asked about this by some of the congregation, he responded, “The first Sunday, my gums were so sore it hurt to talk. The second Sunday, my new dentures were hurting me a lot. The third Sunday, I accidentally grabbed my wife's dentures. I don't know what happened, I just couldn't stop!”

After a long, dry sermon, the minister announced that he wished to meet with the church board after the service. The first man to arrive was a stranger.

“You misunderstood my announcement. This is a meeting of the board of the church,” said the minister.

“That is why I am here,” said the man. “If there is anyone here today more bored than I am, I’d like to meet him or her.”