The morning before Christmas Adam arose and said, "It's Christmas, Eve."
As Noah was building the ark, what type of lights did he use?
FLOOD LIGHTS!
The priest said to the poor farmer, "If you had a horse, would you give it to the Lord?"
"Yes."
"And if you had a cow?"
"Absolutely."
"And a goat?"
"Sure."
"A pig?"
"Now, that's not fair!" protested the farmer. "You know I have a pig!"
What kind of cheese can you take to church?
Swiss cheese, it's holey!